Bloody marvels

I have seen some horrors in three decades of work, but this stopped me in my tracks. It was a breathless article in a national newspaper about the founders of a much-lauded social agency, one of whom boasted that he employed a particular woman because “she was young, and not tied down in a way that a 45-year-old might be”. 

Even as he proudly showed off his ageism, this man had spectacularly failed to recognise who might be signing his contracts. Later that morning, I quoted him to the outraged comms team at my big-budget consumer brand client, and instructed them to never even consider giving work to his agency. Yet again, midlife women had been underestimated and insulted… at what I very much hoped was a not insignificant cost to his business. Comments like this are sadly still all too common. And they ignore three crucial facts. We midlife women run teams and make procurement decisions. We overwhelmingly make the most purchase choices as consumers. And we are among the most focused, creative and strategic people in any business. It’s time to celebrate what Christie Watson calls “the messy magic of midlife”—our potent alchemy of experience, empathy, vision and drive.

Across our industry, I see countless examples of midlife women doing extraordinary things: running teams with vision and strategy, bringing robust financial oversight, insightful and daring commissioning, dreaming up ever more creative comms campaigns, making thriving bookselling happen, overseeing meticulous logistics management. Thousands upon thousands of years of collective experience shine through, time after time. 

It’s not just a case of years on the clock, either. That experience is hard won, and even more fiercely protected, as the demands on us increase once we head into midlife. Over the years, my chats with long-term clients have shifted focus, from purely work-related discussions to a balance of business thinking and a shared acknowledgement of the growing pressures we face daily. Many of us have built careers alongside the changing needs of our children, becoming instantly more productive as we head from parental leave into tight childcare schedules, while battling the widespread misogyny—latent and blatant—that too often hits once we become parents. Before long, our teenagers and young adults need more careful and intensive support than ever before; support we willingly give while trying to maintain our working lives and our sense of self. 

And then, as we watch our bodies change, and manage menopausal waves of self-doubt and surging hormones, our parents slip further into vulnerability, requiring more and more love, care, time and contact. It’s a constant thread of worry that pulls tighter with every year. We see our friends and lovers age alongside us, listen to their stories and support them whenever they need us. And for women of colour and LGBTQ+ colleagues, these heavy layers of emotional labour are piled on top of many other long-term life challenges.

Our superpower

But we do it all. And we do it with love. What does this give us? The most extraordinary power, at work and at home, creatively and strategically, personally and professionally. We lead with empathy and thoughtfulness, after a lifetime of listening. We excel at creative thinking within tight frameworks, whether restrained by time, by budget or by our own emotional bandwidth. We are organised and decisive, based on years of managing multiple pressures. Many of us have built our own businesses around the demands of the rest of our lives. And, frankly, on top of it all, we have zero tolerance of bullshit, after hearing it more times than we care to remember. 

So cherish the midlife women in your business, at home and among your readers. Treasure the unique combination of skills that we bring. Use our knowledge to make every project better

Last but very much not least, we control the money. Yes, we run teams that make procurement decisions. But for an industry that prides itself on consumer focus, it is all too often forgotten that we spend the money too. Every piece of recent research shows that, on average, women over 50 make the vast majority of household purchase decisions and significantly outspend the general population. For any consumer-facing business, ignoring us is a double risk—you insult us as a client and lose us as a customer. 

So cherish the midlife women in your business, at home and among your readers. Treasure the unique combination of skills that we bring. Use our knowledge to make every project better. And celebrate the fact that we are still here, carving out the next stage of our lives with creativity and relish.

Being “tied down”? That’s our superpower. And you mess with superheroes at your peril.

Katie Roden is a  marketing and  publishing consultant with 30 years’  experience. She is also a digital marketing trainer on behalf of Google.